Praise the Lord for Prozac....

I have had such a great streak since I started my 10 days (this time 12) of Prozac before my cycle on Dec. 12th. I had my typical migraine the night before my period started (23rd) but I also had a head cold and my period was late so I didn't realize what was going on. Instead of giving myself a shot like I should of I took a frova and it did nothing. So a few hours later I took another frova and it didn't help much either. I was able to go to sleep that night with the headache but woke up in the middle of the night with it. I considered taking percocet, but since it's not technically on my list I tried something else first. I took some bendaryl and an ativan, got an ice pack and went back to sleep. I woke up without the headache and eventually started my cycle on the 24th. *typical explanation for a drug resistant headache!

The 24th and 25th were fine and then the morning of the 26th I woke up with another one. It wasn't very strong at all but since I know what to do with my period headaches I went ahead and gave myself a shot. I tried to angle the needle in this time and my leg didn't hurt at all this time (except from the initial shot) so that was great. Of course I took the compazine 20 min. before and it really helped quite quickly. I was able to have a normal day. However, I did notice that all day I felt very agitated and restless, unable to sit still. Anxious I guess. I don't know if this was from the DHE, period or what but it was pretty annoying and I tried to distract myself as much as possible and went to bed early to avoid feeling that annoying feeling.
In 15 days I only had 4 headaches I had to treat, including 2 menstrual ones, so that is a great improvement. It will be interestng to see how I do now w/out prozac until Jan. 10th. That's 15 days. It's possible that prozac in general could help a lot so I need to pay attention to that. Also, since the 20th I've increased my Trileptal another 100mg. to 300mg. so that could be a factor but I was noticing improvement before that (because of the prozac).

Last Night There Was a Freakin' Baby Kicking Around in my Leg....

Geesh! It was a great day yesterday, but in the evening, around 7:30, my left temple started to hurt. It wasn't but 30 min. and it was ramping up. Since it's still technically a menstrual migraine I decided to do the DHE injection and not let it get very far out of control...to the point where it wouldn't subside w/out a lot of drugs!

Like last time, first I took the compazine and waited 20 min. I got the syringe ready before my thinking diminished anymore and i wouldn't screw it up like last Thursday.

This time I put it in my right thigh and made sure I was extremely relaxed in that muscle, hoping that my leg wouldn't hurt so bad and for so long like it did on Monday.

It didn't hurt when the medicine was going in, but as soon as I pulled the syringe out my leg started to hurt. Man, that's the weirdest thing. Last night I could have used a pair of crutches, it would have been easier to get around.

I layed down and iced the site and pretty soon the muscle started twitching. Then, it started twitching all up and down the top part of my thigh. It felt like there was a baby inside kicking around in my leg.

I was a little nervous about it because I have started the beta blocker and all, and I can't see what's going on in there. I took 2 aleve to help with the migraine, the pain in my leg, and was hoping that it would help the jumpiness in my muscle. But, just to make sure, we called the Advice Nurse and she said it would be gone by the morning and that I had probably nicked or gotten closer to nicking a nerve. That made sense to me so I didn't worry about it. Within 2 -2 1/2 hours after the injection my migraine pain was gone, and within another hour my leg stopped hurting so I could walk on it. Also, this time I had no pain in my back and chest which had concerned me on Monday. So, all in all, pretty successful.

I did, however, wake up @ 2 a.m. and was still up @ 3. And, I felt wide awake, like it was morning or something. I decided that with just getting over the migraine that losing sleep would probably not help things any. I took 1 Ativan (anti-anxiety) to see if it would help me sleep and probably within a 1/2 hr. I was back in dreamy land.

My concern now, is that my menstrual cycle doesn't seem to be over yet. My DHE perscription says that the injections are for 2-3 x a month. I'm not counting the first one I did since I am positive I didn't have any medicine in it. So that makes 2x so far. But, since I just went off the Levlen (oral b.c. pill for menstrual migraine) it could take a while to get back on my regular cycle. All I'm supposed to be treating myself w/ is Aleve w/ either DHE or Frovatriptan, and those are to be used 2x week. I'm not worried about the 2x week so much right now because he said there'd be bad weeks and with the menstrual action going on, I'm definitely in that week. It's just that if the bleeding continues and I have to do one more injection in the next couple of days, I will pretty much be out of options of how I can help myself here and stay w/in my doctor's orders.

I would just e-mail him about this but he won't be back in the office for 5 more days. I will definitely need to contact him then. I could leave a message with one of his partners, but when I did that last week I never got a call back.

I don't want to annoy the people who are trying to help me (i.e. shoot my help in the foot) but at the same time I need to stay within the parameters that the PA gave me. I have a lot of questions because I have more than 2x a week, so what am I supposed to do on the other days I get one? If it's just pressure @ a 3-4 I can pretty much get by w/ staying home, using ice and heat, not doing any housework and using tiger balm and/or salonpas, peppermint oil. But, if it's the menstrual type, the ones that start up fast and feel more burning, then I can't not treat these. I know he knows that too and doesn't want to leave me hanging, I just didn't take the time to get clarification on how to attack these.

I think he was thinking that I would get IV magnesium sulfate in these in between circumstances. But, we didn't know that 1: I would have to go 40 min. to over an hour away 2. each time I get a treatment the doctor has to call it in and o.k. it first 3. the first time I tried it it didn't help.

I think I can make it until monday though. I really hope. Including today, it's just 5 days away. I cannot predict what will happen in 5 days but I'm sure even though it could be difficult that I can make it until then.

Thank God I'm feeling better today though. Shelley picked me up this morning in her new Honda Element and I went to Starbucks w/ my other friend Susan and their friend Cindy. It's a small thing, but was so nice to have a little girl time. When I got home I started a fire in my woodstove so it's nice and toasty down there. I got 2 new books yesterday that the PA wanted me to read, so think I will take my TAZO Green Tea down there, curl up and start reading "50 Ways to Control Migraines" by Ceabert J. Griffith, N.D., P.A.-C.

success in a syringe

The other day I described the body scan I do, or head scan, as soon as i become concious in the morning. This morning I was "50 % gone." Because I know that during this "hell week" or week of menstrual migraines that I will virtually have a really bad one every day, I decided to try to knock it out A.S.A.P.

Thursday evening when I gave myself the shot it went from bad to worse, so I was a little nervous. I had a fitting for a mouth guard @ 12:40 that I didn't want to cancel, but I had to take the chance and shoot up the DHE. I was confident that if the pain got bad that I could take the anti-anxiety medicine to help cope with the pain, and have someone take me to the doctor for an I.V. if I needed it. My hubs was sick with the flu today but I have a lot of friends who've offered to drive me when I'm unable.

First I took the compazine (anti-nausea med) because DHE can tend to make you nauseous. I waited 20 min. and prepared my syringe. When I was doing it I began to wonder if I even got the medicine in on Thursday afternoon.

Finally I psyched myself up and stuck the hurking 3 in. long needle into my thigh and slowly pushed the medicine in. I'm quite a good shot taker since as a child I spent seven years getting weekly allergy injections. It's just a little different shooting up yourself!

I know to keep your muscles relaxed or you can have a lot of muscle pain @ the site, and I am really good @ doing that even though I'm nervous. I probably gave myself about a 100 imitrex injections before. But as the medicine went in it really hurt and I had to just keep pushing it in. Fortunately it's only 1 ml. of medicine.

Almost immediately my thigh hurt so bad. I probably limped around for an hour. This helped me determine that I absolutely did not give myself a proper injection Thursday. It didn't hurt at all.

It's really no surprise I had difficulty Thursday as my pain was so high. Even when my pain is half that my thinking starts to really get impaired and slowed down. It takes me a long time to concentrate and think about something. This was what it was like when I was getting the syringe ready that day, but not today.

Also, about an hour after the shot my back by my shoulder blades was having a lot of pressure. Almost like someone was sitting on me. Then it would radiate to the front. I read the information that came with the medicine and it said if you have these symptoms to notify the doctor, advice nurse or pharmacist. I e-mailed my doctor but never heard anything back.

My side effects from the shot, except for that, were minimal. I mean, I'm not trying to downplay those symptoms, because they were distressing. If this is what it will always be like when I take the DHE it won't be like I can feel better and resume regular activity in an hour. It took about an hour for my head to feel good and then about 3 hours for the rest of my body to feel good. I took 2 Aleve which helped my back and chest immensely.

I was able to make my dental appointment and go for a short walk. Again, I didn't want to overdo it as I'm really gearing up for tomorrow. Especially with my husband sick now it is very important to me that I feel good to run the kids around tomorrow night. They will accept going along with someone else, but I know that my daughter especially will be disappointed if I am not able to go, and especially if my husband isn't able to go either.

Only time will tell though...

Saturday, busy day...

Saturday was such a busy day, I was really nervous about if I was going to get through the whole thing because it was the last day of soccer games for max-ay and meyers d. Since my husband coaches our son, and their games were at the same time, I had to take meyers d to her game.

When I woke up in the morning I felt no pain. It's a really sad thing when as soon as you become concious, that you do a body scan (or more accurately, a head scan) to determine if your a 1/4 of the way gone, 1/2 way gone, 100% gone....or perfect. My anxiety was still so high, it felt like I couldn't take very deep breaths. I told my husband that if fear had hands, it was choking me.

One of the things the man talked to me about on the 24 hr. psych. line the night before, was that first thing in the morning I needed to go to Urgent Care and talk to a doctor about how high my anxiety and agitation were. A few years ago I had a medication that I could take when I was pretty funked out and it would get me calmed down long enough for the intensity to pass. Basically it helped me not do anything stupid to myself. I have an underlying bipolar "problem", so it's very important that this issue be addressed, but that whole aspect of me is a completely long story so I'm not going to even try to explain it now.

The clinic got me right in after I told them how high my blood pressure was and how difficult my night was. The doctor was so fantastic that I was shocked. He leaned in when he was listening to me explain what was going on. He totally thought we should address the high blood pressure as it greatly contributes to the migraines and the anxiety. Or, (most likely), the high pain from the migraines causes the high blood pressure and anxiety. Also, my blood pressure was still high, 137/100. He felt we needed to address that because some of the medications used to treat blood pressure are also migraine meds. Interesting, eh?

He noticed in my chart that I had been on a beta blocker before. Propanolol. Long story why I went off that, but it really helped control the migraines. Now that I am on another migraine controlling med., an anti-convulsant and mood stabilizer called Lamictal (anti convulsants are also mood stabilizers and migraine meds...another interesting fact), I felt very confident in trying it again. One of the strange things that happens to me preceeding a migraine, is that I sometimes feel my pulse throbbing really strongly in the large vein in my neck, right below my chin. It actually hurts and is quite painful and within minutes or hours a migraine can start. I have told many doctors numerous times about this problem but it never gets out and out addressed, although I am confident that they have taken note of it.

So, Mr. Quick Care Doctor prescribed Propanolol and Ativan. Ativan is the anti-anxiety med that is just taken when needed and now that my concerns have been addressed (I even got an anti-nausea medicine that is crucial to take before the DHE injection) I know that I can totally have peace and not need it at all, or only in times of great pain or the great pain aftermath.

Meyers D had a fabulous game that I was able to go to (the pulsing in my neck that started in the doctors office subsided within a half and hour of the first beta blocker pill) and then it was off to her party. I wanted to see her get her trophy and fully participate, but going to an indoor amusement place is like the last place a migraneur who just spent the night before in the ER should be. I stuck purple earplugs in my ears and crossed my fingers.

It was crazy insane in that place. There were like two other soccer pizza parties and a birthday party. Everyone could barely move. It was so loud that no one could hear what the coach was saying when he passed out the awards. As soon as he was done I told the hubs that I better leave while I was still feeling good, as the day was only 1/2 over with all the activities we had planned. But I had went, which I know blessed my daughter and for sure was a blessing to me. It makes my husband smile when I can participate because so often we don't know if I'll be able to until a few hours before an event.

After getting home about an hour, it started up again.

Why so many you're wondering? (If your not by now then check your compassion thermometer...) I'll get to that maybe in tomorrow's post.

So this time I took a frovatriptan and within an hour I was feeling better and ready to go to max-ay's ice cream party for soccer. This time I didn't wear earplugs because all my lady friends were there (other soccer mom's) and they all wanted to know how I was doing so we had to catch up.

After the party, Super Star's parents took the kids to their house and the hubs and I went to a Patsy Cline impersonator concert. I didn't really want to go but the hubs likes stuff like that and it seems like I can't participate in things so often. We need to do things as a couple, so I took the purple earplugs and enjoyed a much more toned down show.

All in all a good day, it's hard to believe I could endure such a long, busy day after being in the ER. It probably would have been better if I stayed home and rested, but I'm sure my family feels shortchanged a lot of the time, I know I feel that way, so sometimes I just have to suck it up and plow ahead.

just when i thought things couldn't get worse...

Today turned out to be a lot like yesterday. My day started off great. Woke up with a clear head and after taking the kids to school I went for a long wlak @ the lake again. This time I walked the whole stinkin' thing, about 4 miles. It felt good to be out in the crisp morning air and to feel the tightness in my legs from the exercise. I was feeling pretty emotional though and had to fight back tears.

Also, my mind was filled with worry and fear about the pain returning. I had to force myself to look at the trees, the birds and the ducks....force myself to think about the good things that were happening now, all around me. It was so hard. Within minutes my mind was back to the night before and planning what I would do if my pain came back.

After I returned home, about 1 in the afternoon, I again started to feel pressure in my head. Before the pain could really escalate, I drove to the doctor's office and went to the nurse's treatment center to get an i.v. magnesium sulfate procedure that was a standing order for me. They told me that they didn't give them @ this site, so an RN called around to see where I could go to get it. We discovered that I had to drive an hour to find a place that would do it, but I knew my husband would take me.

When I left home about 6 p.m. my pain was about a 5. By the time I got to the ambulatory care center @ Sunnyside my pain was about 6. I received the treatment and when it was over there was no change in my pain. Also, my blood pressure was 147/107 and the nurse who was attending me said that I needed to get my blood pressure checked again within a couple of days. We drove home and about 20 min. from home my pain was @ an 8 and I vomited. When we pulled into town I started crying and asked my husband to take me to the E.R. I didn't want to go home and just lay there suffering. I was soooo tired of hurting.

Of course the emergency room was busy, it always is, and it was a Friday night. My husband said, "Are you sure you want to stay?" I started crying and said, "I'm not leaving!!!"

I don't know how long we waited, it must have been two hours. I was completely miserable, agitated and full of anxiety when they called me back. I was at the point where all I wanted to do was die. In fact, I would have done anything for someone to just give me something so I could leave the planet. When they called me back to the room I started crying, first because I hurt so bad, and second I was hopeful that my misery would finally be over.

Of course once I got in there it would be at least another 1/2 hour before I got my first medication. Mentally I was really starting to lose it. At one point, I looked @ my husband so desperately and said, "I want to die, please just let me die..."

The first med they gave me in the i.v. calmed me down, the second was an anti-nausea medicine and the third was for the migraine. They also did a CT scan which showed nothing. After I got back to my room the ER doctor said something about me going home. My pain was down to a 5 but I was absolutely petrified to go home and told him that I had hoped my pain would be lower before I went home. He said they could administer the last medication they gave me again. That brought it down to a 2. But I have to say, either my anxiety, or the combination of meds, or both of these combined, caused me to feel completely drugged and very unsettled, like I was just squirming in my skin....it's hard to describe. I think the anti-nausea med was called compazine and the migraine med was seroquil (??) something with an "s" anyways! My blood pressure was still kind of high but lower than it was @ Sunnyside.

The weird thing was, that with this combination I didn't sleep, but I could hardly open my eyes for at least an hour. Very strange... according to my outpatient letter, the ER treated me for acute migraine headache, acute tension-type headache, acute uncontrolled hypertension and acute anxiety reaction.

After I got home (2 a.m.) I tried to go to sleep. I was really fighting some bad thoughts and so anxious about the headache returning. I called the 24 hour psych line and talked to a nice guy who gave me some really good suggestions. One was to follow up w/ a doctor the next day and talk about anti-anxiety medication.

I finally fell asleep about 5:30 a.m. and slept for an hour.

This is a day I hope to never repeat...